Hollywood: An Obituary

by Trevor Carter

Here lies the movie industry. It’s once glorious run cut down in its prime by cable television. The movie industry is survived by Jujubes, overly buttered popcorn, and whatever other overpriced treat no self respecting individual would eat outside of a theatre. Cable television, sensing an opening, struck early and often to bring down the mighty behemoth and claim the spot as the Entertainment Mecca to which millions of bored Americans flock to.

Let me begin doling out the blame/praise by first commending television on doing their part in stepping up the stakes. Cable shows like AMC’s Mad Men and Breaking Bad paired along with network broadcasts such as NBC’s Community and 30 Rock have become appointment viewing. For the price of two tickets to see whatever Kate Hudson’s flop du jour may be, the American public can see four hours each of what Don Draper and Liz Lemon are up to in their vaguely accurate worlds. Television producers and networks know that they have to put the best product out there so that they can live to see a second season, or else they will be packing their offices and trying to move to another network they can attempt to sink. They are aware of the hundreds of other options that consumers have in front of them and are desperately fighting for the ever-valuable Nielsen Rating.

Hollywood can’t say their own blood isn’t on their hands. Movies which in an earlier era could be characterized as “B Movies” are complete with $50 million budgets and A-List actors. They don’t care about critical acclaim, they are only after the dollar sign. They know that they can create one good movie and be set for life. Nic Cage is still riding the wave of Leaving Las Vegas even after the flops that were Bangkok Dangerous and Knowing. Directors are also given the same leeway. Personal hero and indie Filmmaker Kevin Smith gets to create Jersey Girl and the aptly titled Cop Out all because he made the cult classic Clerks.

And so, it is with that we bid you adieu Hollywood, you will be missed.